Can You Teach Me How to Be Bad?

Elias asked, "Can you teach me how to be bad?..I want to be a pirate." Well Captain Hook went off to school today and sang in his Halloween program. (The singing is a regular part of their curriculum.) And then they paraded over to the nursing home for more singing. We made the hook from a coat hanger and he grabbed his Noah's ark on his way out so he could have a ship. They did the story of Noah in chapel this week and I think he is mixing metaphors!

One more question...

Elias: Mom are you going to be on a cross when you die?
Me: No...
Elias:Jesus died on a cross.
Me: Yes, a long time ago that's how criminals were punished.
Elias: (running towards his room pointing to a cross) There's Jesus' cross!

Are You Going to Stay Married Forever?

Tonight Elias began with a doozy of a question. I think he is trying to work out some questions of existentialism and of change.

Elias: Mommy, are you and Daddy going to stay married forever?
Me: Yes.
Elias: Why?
Me: Well, because we love each other and we made a promise to God that we would. We said we would stay married until we die.
Elias: Oh, when will you die?
Me: I hope not for a while.
Elias: Why?
Me: Because I want to see you grow up.
Elias: What is being dead? Is it when you die?
Me: Yes, it is when your body doesn't work anymore on earth.
Elias: (Elias beginning to get tearful) I don't want you to die.
Me: Don't worry, I won't die for a long time.
Elias: Good. Do you want to see how tall I am?

I have had similar conversations with Elias before, but what gets me is that parents do die when their kids are young. Mine did. My godson's mother died at 36 when he was one year old. It seems like we are kidding them when we assure them that we will not die while they are young. Yet the flip side is that we don't want our children living in constant fear of our deaths'. And most probabilities in advanced industrialized nations point to the fact that parents usually do live long enough to see their children grow up. I want to be honest about death with my kids, but I don't want them to have to obsess about it either. I guess I see it as one more topic that we need to talk about truthfully along with so many others. And, perhaps offer only enough information as they request. I welcome your thoughts!

Where the Wild Things Are

A Night Owl
A Turtle



One of our favorite books is Where the Wild Things Are. In fact, Adelaide often goes up to people we do not know and says, "I'll eat you up." That's especially helpful in a new town...In any case, we had a splendid night on Friday because we went to a wonderful showcase of pumpkin carvings and there were three renditions of Where the Wild Things Are. It was spitting outside, quite warm, and dusk. It was a great night to enjoy the fall weather.

Elias' Chapel Debut

Part of the currullm at Elias' preschool is chapel. Today was the first day that chapel got up and going. I think the kids have chapel twice a month. It has been the custom at Christ Church that the priest leads chapel. Adam had each child go around the room and say their name at the beginning of the time. When he got to Elias, he said, as with all the other kids, "And what is your name?" Elias responded with some consternation, "I'm Elias, your son."

Mothers' Morning Out

Adelaide started school about two weeks ago. Once a week, I drop her off and enjoy two blissful hours without small people. The first time she went to school, she hesitated in the parking lot and was full throttle once she got in the classroom. When I came to pick her up she was proudly singing "Wheels on the Bus." This week they painted pumpkins and Adelaide loves to say "my teacher gave me that" and point proudly to her pumpkin. I can't wait until next year when she really can attend school; she just soaks in everything at home that her brother does.

Adelaide's gig as a nanny

As I said before, I usually shower while it is just Adelaide and me at home. This morning I blithely suggested she change Madeline's diaper and get her ready for school while I got ready, too. Much to my surprise I found the Madeline doll absolutely smothered in diaper creme and nestled in a size 4 diaper. This meant she climbed up on her changing table and very deliberately got baby Madeline diapered. Sweet but very messy and just one more reason one doesn't want to have to share the bathroom with a two year old. Of course, she tried to rectify all the diaper creme by using toilet paper to wipe it off. Next time I think I shall suggest a simple stroll with the doll instead. But who knows, she might end up outside careening down Baltimore Pike.

Are there child labor laws in PA anyway?

Wisconsin has also had a history of being a very progressive state. You know, with all those liberals in Madison it was very hard to put your kids to work, and not get nabbed by child and family services. However, from what I can tell of politics here, we might be able to not only employ our kids, but not pay them social security benefits as well.

Yes, we have a new routine after dinner which involves each child "getting" a turn with either the dust buster or the dirt devil. So far, it has worked like a charm and it is one less thing I have to do in my nightly routine. In fact, Elias now sets the table, clears his plate, and they both clean up all their toys before bedtime.Now I just need to train them to clean the bathrooms because I tell you, sharing a bathroom with a 2 year old and 4 year old is just not fun!

The Devil in the Rectory

Here is my devil pushing the Dirt Devil in the Rectory.

Baby Liam visits PA

We were excited to welcome our little cousin, aka Baby Liam, to our new home. The kids really like that they are his "big" cousins since with their other 5 cousins they are little. We took baby Liam and his parents to downtown Philly to the Benjamin Franklin Park and we introduced him to the joys of the playground and the carousel.

Self Portraits

My kids have not been given much opportunity to take pictures with my camera. Most of the time, I do not let them use it. But, this particular day I was in a more charitable mood. So, each kid got to take a picture of himself/herself. A little navel gazing never hurt anyone, right?

Elias lands his first job as an Administrative Assistant

The other night the phone rang and Elias answered it. I was in a completely different room so all I heard was some murmuring and then the phone being hung up. Elias came in and and I asked who had called. He quickly replied, "Bibi." I checked the caller i.d and saw that it was in fact not Bibi, but the Senior Warden from our church. I called her back so that I could provide her with the information she needed and apologize for Elias's phone manners. Instead, when she answered she told me that Elias had answered the phone, given his name, said he was "Fine. Thank you." Then when she asked if his Daddy was home he correctly replied, "No, he's at a meeting over at Christ Church." That was all she needed to know because she was just checking to see if the meeting was still on. They said good-bye to each other and he hung up the phone. I was stunned. After all, this is the same child who told a dad at the park that he was there alone and his name was Spider Man. How things change in just a few months.

Boo Hewlett Packard

We purchased a brand new computer in July. After loading the requisite software, we thought we were good to go But, a few weeks ago the computer would just freeze on me. Then last week the sound died completely. We got the computer up and working after an hour and a half on the pone with a nice young man in India. But, now, it seems more than frustrating to have to go through the very same process. The computer is only four months old. So, I have been borrowing the laptop but I can't get my pictures to upload here.

Some kids quotes for the interim until things get working:

Me: Let's go get Adelaide from baby school.
Elias: No, let's get her from toddler school!

Adelaide upon seeing her father's computer set-up for a power point presentation in church yells, "Daddy's email." Then upon seeing a new GPS device in our car inherited from her grandparents says "Mommy's email."

Moving, Moving, Moving

Since our computer is down, I can't upload any of my pictures. So, instead I though I might reflect on aspects of our move. Any body knows that moving ranks up there as a major stress along with getting a new job, or losing a job, or experiencing a loss of many different kinds. All things considered, this move has been so smooth. But, it doesn't change the fact that moving is still hard.

The Rectory:
We are living in a C.S. Lewis novel. Adelaide and Elias are Lucy and Edwin. We dwell in this stone house which was built circa 1870 in memory of a parishioner. The house has this wonderful front porch that looks out onto our limited grassy knoll and the busy street on which the church sits. Upon entering our front door, you get a view of a long front hall and 12 to 14 feet windows in the living room. All the windows are this large and allow for lots of light, which is something I relish. The dining room has the same windows, one of which is a mirror, which creates a nice dynamic in the room--as well as lots of entertainment for the kids as they dress up in their various pirate gear or firemen suits. The kitchen is becoming homier everyday. Despite the house's size, the kitchen almost has a cottage feel to it thanks to a talented parishioner who worked to make it more homey for us. One of the greatest aspects of the house is that it comes with a laundry room. I get to fold laundry to my heart's content with a view of the playground, which is adjacent to our backyard/backslab. (More about that, in a moment.) And, the laundry room has cupboard space which means for the first time we are no longer storing food in the basement. Now we need not worry that rat poison and Adam's fancy sea salt might be confused.
We open the back door and have a view of the parish hall as well as a concrete slab. Somehow this doesn't fit into the whole CS Lewis milieu. Now the lemonade of this lemon is that it is fenced in and the kids had a blast playing out there when we moved in. They still like to ride their bikes and run around out there and I can let them lose unsupervised. The down side is that we have no "real yard' of our own. Mind you, Adam loves not having to mow or rake, and honestly, right now with everything else on our plate, I grant that it is a luxury. But, I have dreams of a jackhammer in my arms this summer and lots of planting. Now the playground backs right up to our cement slab. Great when school is out of session. Not so great when school is in session. Hard to keep social butterfly from sneaking onto the playground and making more friends.
Another romantic aspect of this house, besides sharing it with my charming husband, is the carillon. At 1pm, and 7pm, and 9pm we are treated to the ringing of the bells and some nice Anglican hymns. The views from both the windows on the stairwell are of a stunning cross lit up against the night sky. And, at night we hear the gentle whirs of the fountain if the sirens from across the street don't block them out.
I still haven't quite come to terms with the idea that we have lost a neighborhood. Our neighborhood in Madison was so active with events and informal gatherings. Our house sits next to the church and the parking lot. There is an apartment building on the other side of the parking lot, but somehow I can't imagine we'll find someone there to water our plants. I think I've finally figured out that the house is almost like dwelling in a condo or apartment building. Our needs outside are really taken care of and we will probably have little interaction with people around us--unless I work hard to change that. Of course, we have only been here a month and half. So, there's time to discover differently and there is also plenty of time to work on setting up a neighborhood association.
All in all a lovely dwelling place with lots of closets and rooms to play hide and seek in. What a treat to have all this space to share with others.

What a Difference a Year Makes!

Adelaide on her 1st birthday a year ago!

Is she only two?

It seems like I have been calling Adelaide a two year old for some time now. Part of that has to do with the fact that she is a second child; I just couldn't be bothered with counting the months after they surpassed 18. The other reason is that some of her behavior has been that of a two year old for some time now.

Now I know this post is a little overdue, but we really have been having technical difficulties since we moved of one kind or another. Recently, it was that my screen wasn't working. How do I describe my little girl? Adelaide is a child bursting with determination. Unlike Elias, she is much harder to distract when she has her mind set on a task. She will say "Addie do it." As of late, clothes have become a bit of an issue. She tries to get out of wearing something she doesn't like by saying, "too hot." The other afternoon after a long struggle for a nap, I went in to check on her. She had managed to remove her sleepsack , her pajamas, and her diaper. She was fast asleep on her monkey in the buff. Perhaps, it was "too hot." She also loves to use the potty, when it is convenient for her. She refuses any kind of kiddie potty seat and has been known to ride the toilet seat backwards as if she is lassoing a horse. Determination also rears its head with washing her hands as soon as she is finished eating. She really seems to notice messes--unlike a certain someone--and want to get them off her as soon as possible. (I wish this meant that she doesn't make messes, but that is not true.) Interestingly enough, messes and order are somewhat important to her. If I have a hole in my shirt or my jeans, she will touch it and say "Mommy, what happened?" She is fairly good about putting away her toys.

Recently, I have noticed how well she plays on her own. In this large, vertical house, I have had a few scary moments where I haven't been able to find her. One time, the back door was ajar and I feared she had escaped the playground and possibly gone into the parking lot--or worse near the street. I eventually found her tucked away in the downstairs bathroom where she was probably trying to wash her hands or brush her teeth. While I take my shower, Addie plays with her Madeline dolls. When I go to blow dry my hair, she takes each doll to me, one by one, for their individual hair session. Sometimes, I just peek my head out of the bathroom and find her very content on her bedroom floor.

Adelaide likes books and right now loves the story of Zagazoo--which I highly recommend to any reader. But, she mostly "reads" at bedtime and doesn't follow you around the house with books in tow trying to get you to read all the time. For a long time now, Adelaide has been a singer. She likes to sing "Hosanna, my body" which I am sure is a deep theological reflection on the Eucharist! Interestingly enough, she and I are doing a music class and I have had a window to her personality that I had never seen before. She sits on my lap and does NOT get up and dance. This is so unlike my experience that I had with her brother. He was so wild the teacher had to find more ways to childproof cabinets. Frankly, I have had to eat my "thoughts" because I used to think the kids who just sat on their parents laps were bumps on a log. Now I have my very own bump. However, as soon as we get in the car my bump is singing.

Adelaide is rough and tough. She enjoys wrestling with her brother--as if she had a choice. Unfortunately, she is exhibiting some 2 year old behavior, like biting him. The other day she was playing with a boy in the park who was 2.5 and quite large. She just went over to him and pushed him over. Poor boy replied with, "play, don't push." You tell her!

Adelaide is not an obsequious child at all. One of her favorite phrases is a loud and resonant "No, thank you!" She is very compliant to taking a time out and categorically refuses to apologize. Interesting mix. Her less charming self says things like"Time-out and Go away." How nice.

Overall, Addie is an easy kid who I barely notice having around in the mornings while Elias is at school. She began the "Why" phase about six months ago, but needs nice and simple answers. She is mostly sweet, a teeny bit shy, but full of piss and vinegar--and knows when she is being a ham. We love our two year old girl!