Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Happy Advent I
At my parish, the Adult Forum had an Intergenerational Advent wreath making as the way to start and mark the season of Advent. At the last minute, I grabbed an oasis to take home. I threw it in the car and wondered if I would have time to use it. Of course, on Sunday afternoon everyone went off to take naps except Elias and Adelaide. So, I used the time to take them on a walk around our home and pick-up items from nature to make a wreath. We did so and the kids really enjoyed it. We took evergreens, red berries, leaves, and even sticks to make our wreath. Elias made a cross out of the sticks and placed it in the wreath. (A bit too penitent for me, but, hey, everyone has their own Advent religiousity.) In the last picture, you see the awake father helping Elias make a cardboard Advent calendar. He made a circle and wanted to add 24 pieces of cardboard to it for each day.
Our Thanksgiving Meal
I'm always amazed that I think I just have a few minor things to do on Thanksgiving day and then it ends up taking two more hours. However, this year with having the Wilcox gang the day before and the whole Kradel gang the day of our Thanksgiving feast, I must say I'm quite proud of my beautiful table. Once we got cleaned up from breakfast around 10:30, Colleen and I finished making the last bits of the meal. She made a stuffing, I set the table and got the last things warmed. We had an absolutely delicious meal complete with our yummy turkey, gravy, sweet potato tart, cranberry sauce, homemade rolls, brussel sprouts, and the mashed potato chive and sour cream casserole. We had apple and pumpkin pie after everyoene woke-up from naps. Our kitchen got a real workout. It took the men about two hours to clean-up, but I believe it was worth it. Here is Josiah enjoying--and consuming--his first Thanksgiving meal.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Preparations
Our Thanksgiving was quiet and simple today. We have been making pies, stocking up on milk and OJ, planning breakfast menus, and washing towels to make sure we have enough for all our guests. The highlight of my day was seeing Elias serve as a junior usher this morning. He was so sweetly and gently cared for by the K's and they taught him everything he needed to do--including reverencing the altar. It was a glorious sight to see him from the bird's eye view of the altar as we sang the Doxology. The other sweet thing was that Adelaide nearly jumped out of her seat because I processed in the liturgy today. (I was the guest preacher.) In any ase, it was a great start to a busy, but low-key day of more preparations.
Tomorrow my brother and his family arrive for a visit. Then my in-laws get here and Adam's brother ansd family will be here by nightfall. We will have our big Thanksgiving meal on Saturday. Here's the menu: organic turkey from our friend's farm, a mashed potato and sour cream adn chive casserole (found the recipe in the NYtimes food section), fresh cranberyy/orange relish, roasted brussel sprouts with bacon, stuffing, gravy, homemmade rolls made by Adam, butternut squash or sweet potatoes, apple pie, pumpkin pie, and walnut pie--we didn't have pecans. In the meantime I'm planning a veggie chili and chicken noodle soup for lunch tomorrow with corn bread and salad and something sweet for dessert.
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Applesauce Adventures
I had it in my mind to block off an afternoon to make applesauce with the kids. I even invited friends so that we would be able to enjoy this project together. I thought that I would make enough applesauce that we could give it to all the kids' teachers for Christmas--and then have plenty leftover to feed my kids and our Thanksgiving guests. Well, guess what? I learned it was much more about process than product.
The kids enjoyed using the apple peeler and corer. We guided the food mill. We added cinnamon. We had three pots going on the stove and at least 4 dozen apples--probably six. After the sampling we ended up with three jars of applesauce. I guess I will need to find another Saturday to get my present making done.
The kids enjoyed using the apple peeler and corer. We guided the food mill. We added cinnamon. We had three pots going on the stove and at least 4 dozen apples--probably six. After the sampling we ended up with three jars of applesauce. I guess I will need to find another Saturday to get my present making done.
Monday, November 14, 2011
My Sensory Boy
Elias has been getting along well in kindergarten. He is thriving and learning new things like how to sound out words, how to count by tens, how to sort and organize, and how to get along well with his friends. In many ways, we are lucky because his kindergarten teacher has a background in special education. She also has a son with Sensory Processing Disorder. At our conference, she was not concerned yet with how his sensory issues were affecting his academics, but wanted to flag for us that Elias is easily distracted , has a hard time following directions, and can be slow to finish a project. None of these comments were difficult for us to hear. But, I was concerned how his sensory issues were going to continue to intersect with his classroom issues.
She recommended that we get him evaluated at a place called a Total Approach. They have such comprehensive services and ways of evaluating the kids both physically and intellectually that they will be better able to pinpoint how to help him. For example, we know he has auditory issues which probably make it difficult for him to "hear" the teacher when she gives instructions. They have ways of figuring this out and then also, hopefully, will have some recommendations for us. Most likely, this will involve some intense occupational therapy to try and regulate his sensory system.
I have noticed that over the past two to three weeks Elias' has been a bit out of whack. When he comes home from school, he needs to play on the playground for at least an hour. If we can't do that, then he will jump off his bed into a bean bag chair about thirty times. He will seek out ways to modulate his body's need for more physical input. You can only imagine that the poor kid holds it all together during the 7 hours of school and then needs to find an outlet soon after. (In the picture above, the OT is making a sandwich with his body and he thought that was fantastic. He really liked the pressure of the ball and it calmed him down for a while.)
At this point, Elias was able to transition very smoothly from literally throwing himself around the mats to sitting for an auditory listening test. He was so cute and calm. (Another reason we know that he is not ADHD. Although many sensory kids are misdiagnosed that way.)
In this sequence, Elias is trying to touch his opposite foot with his opposite arm. For kids with sensory issues, motor planning is often difficult. He has a hard time knowing how to do something like that unless it is explicitly explained. Hence, why at soccer he does well as a defender because he can run super fast and get in the way and eventually kick the ball. But, he isn't very good at dribbling and passing and planning--much better at reacting.
I think he was getting tired at this point.
This past picture just cracks me up. More motor planning but with issues of balance and having his eyes closed.
I'm hopeful that we will get some good feedback. I worry because I know that much of what we may need done is probably not covered by insurance. But, we will cross that bridge when we get there. The very good news is that kids' brains are still malleable and it is a good time to help him as he enters his "school" years. The other positive piece is this may help Elias get an IEP and therefore all of the services he may need may be covered by the school system. All I know is that I will have lots of paperwork on my desk once we get the report.
She recommended that we get him evaluated at a place called a Total Approach. They have such comprehensive services and ways of evaluating the kids both physically and intellectually that they will be better able to pinpoint how to help him. For example, we know he has auditory issues which probably make it difficult for him to "hear" the teacher when she gives instructions. They have ways of figuring this out and then also, hopefully, will have some recommendations for us. Most likely, this will involve some intense occupational therapy to try and regulate his sensory system.
I have noticed that over the past two to three weeks Elias' has been a bit out of whack. When he comes home from school, he needs to play on the playground for at least an hour. If we can't do that, then he will jump off his bed into a bean bag chair about thirty times. He will seek out ways to modulate his body's need for more physical input. You can only imagine that the poor kid holds it all together during the 7 hours of school and then needs to find an outlet soon after. (In the picture above, the OT is making a sandwich with his body and he thought that was fantastic. He really liked the pressure of the ball and it calmed him down for a while.)
At this point, Elias was able to transition very smoothly from literally throwing himself around the mats to sitting for an auditory listening test. He was so cute and calm. (Another reason we know that he is not ADHD. Although many sensory kids are misdiagnosed that way.)
In this sequence, Elias is trying to touch his opposite foot with his opposite arm. For kids with sensory issues, motor planning is often difficult. He has a hard time knowing how to do something like that unless it is explicitly explained. Hence, why at soccer he does well as a defender because he can run super fast and get in the way and eventually kick the ball. But, he isn't very good at dribbling and passing and planning--much better at reacting.
I think he was getting tired at this point.
I'm hopeful that we will get some good feedback. I worry because I know that much of what we may need done is probably not covered by insurance. But, we will cross that bridge when we get there. The very good news is that kids' brains are still malleable and it is a good time to help him as he enters his "school" years. The other positive piece is this may help Elias get an IEP and therefore all of the services he may need may be covered by the school system. All I know is that I will have lots of paperwork on my desk once we get the report.
My Scooter Boy
Our little Jed is devoted to the activities and pursuits of his two older siblings. Yesterday, we took our Sunday afternoon walk to the playground. He was pushed in the stroller and Addie and Eli rode their scooters there. Well, he would have none of that age discrimination. He spent the whole time at the playground trying to ride Adelaide's scooter--without a helmet. While he did not figure out the logistics he did have his tongue out the whole time as he tried to manage his 24lb body onto a big kid's scooter.
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Can you say "time change?"
The time change finally caught up with Adelaide. She fell asleep during her quiet time in this interesting position.
Monday, November 7, 2011
Emerging literacy
I have decided that snapping pictures of the kids' artwork and stories is a great idea. Then I can have their work digitally, but I don't need to hang on to piles and piles of papers. It also means that my whole laundry room does not get mistaken for a preschool classroom--like it did one day when a preschool parent marched right into our kitchen via the laundry room thinking it was the school.
The below pictures are Elias' work. It is quite obvious that his fine motor is still quite immature, but I was fascinated by two things in the following pieces. The first one is that over the summer Elias refused to be in the kitchen when we were cooking because he was afraid of the gas stove--both the flame and the crackling of the food. This fear became very palpable right after we had a small fire at the church and the firetrucks came. So, I found it fascinating that when he grows up he wants to be a firefighter. Then he wrote the job of a firefighter is to fight fire. The last sentence is harder to decipher but he wrote, " I want to go into burning buildings." I know you can't really get that, but I'm amazed that a child who did not know how to write anything except his name when he got to kindergarten two months ago is now hearing consonant sounds and using them as writing tools.
The second picture is much simpler. It just says "I love Mom and Dad and Adelaide" Love, Elias. Now that is a keeper because it's our first hand written love note and he included his sister. A side note there is that he and Addie have been getting along beautifully the last two months. They are seriously enjoying playing with each other, collaborating on things like hiding from us in the house and telling each other secrets. They are verbally less competitive and it is a joy to see them playing so well. I don't know what has changed, but I'm just thankful.
This last piece is from the illustrator extraordinaire in the family. I think you can read the story which she dictated to her teacher. Adelaide continues to paint and write every day at school. She is our artistic and creative girl.
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Abundant Generosity: Not Ostentatious Religiousity
A sermon Preached on Sunday, October 30th, on the Gospel of Matthew, Chapter 23.
Before we come into this thick text this morning, we must remember that Jesus left the Pharisees so stumped that they stopped asking questions.
Yes, the give and take and the push and pull of the last few chapters of the gospel seem to have come to a stand still.
Think back with me that over the last few weeks we have tracked all kinds of conversations that really weren't conversations but were truly verbal "traps."
We had the dichotomy of loyalty to Caesar or to God.
We had the silly question over marriage and the resurrection.
But, finally they thought they could stick it to Jesus by asking him to name the most important commandment.
He nailed it by both quoting Deuteronomy "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and all your mind...score one point for Jesus.
He quoted the shema, but then he added his own spin "You shall love your neighbor as yourself."
When these final verbal duels come to conclusion, the 22nd chapter of Matthew ends with these dire words.
"No one was able to give him an answer, nor from that day did anyone dare to ask him any more questions."
So, now the tables are turned.
Instead of being grilled, Jesus is the griller.
He is on his final journey and he is ready to dispense with any pretense--with any niceties.
He is done playing intellectual or emotional games with his critics.
And, today he is coming out against ostentatious examples of religiosity.
To us, this is probably a funny image.
We live far enough away from enclaves of orthodox Judaism that the picture of esteemed rabbis with flowing fringes and phylacteries is a foreign one to us.
(Phylacteries, by the way, are tied on to men's arms, and they use them for prayer. They are made of leather and contain small pieces of Hebrew scriptures literally tied into them.)
But, imagine if you will, people in public doing their very best to show other people that they are at prayer or that they are publicly religious people.
Perhaps, you have struggled with a dimension of religious ostentation.
I know when I first started to regularly attend Ash Wednesday services, I debated whether to wipe the cross formed from ashes from my forehead when the liturgy was over.
And, if I did, would I go so far as to wipe any sign of dirt off my forehead?
Or would I instead leave my cross on as a sign of the penitential nature of the day?
Would that cross for me be a sign of ostentation or perhaps a sign of humbled obedience?
Of course, no one can answer that question for you;
I have finally surmised that as Christianity takes a pervasive back seat to secularism that my little cross is a way for me to witness to my faith on such an important day.
I leave it on and people in grocery stores point out the dirty smudge on my forehead and I blithely smile.
However, the Pharisees desire for honor and homage was of a different ilk.
The Pharisees desire for prestige and honor comes under fire by Jesus because theirs was a need to draw attention to themselves.
Their "brand" of religiosity put a heavier burden on the poor--especially poor peasants and urban poor.
In many ways, their teachings imposed more burdens on the least of these.
So, in light of the journey Jesus has begun in Jerusalem, the journey culminating in the cross, he has said enough.
And, this is where all those horrible clichés come in.
Things like: They say, but they do not do. They talk the talk, but don't walk the walk.
Unfortunately, it is some of these clichés that give us, the church, a bad rap.
But, really we don't need to take these things to heart if we dig deeply and show people who we are...The church, at her best, is a community gathered without the hypocrisy of those few Pharisees.
Yes, our clergy wear collars.
You may say that is vain.
I merely say it's helpful.
When you go into a restaurant, your waiter usually wears black.
That's helpful, too, so you know to whom you should gesture to place your order.
But, I posit that the church is the one place where we all receive the same treatment before God. In the culture of the church, it is your baptism that you share with everyone else here.
Not one of you got to skip it because of the street you live on, or because you had a PhD by your name, or because your mother was a founding member of the Daughters of the American Revolution.
In the church, we are all asked to pledge of our time and our talent.
But, let's be frank, we are also asked to pledge of our finances.
Some of you pledge a lot of money, some of you pledge a little, some of you don't pledge at all. And, yet, we all gather with our hands, palms up, and receive the body and blood of Jesus Christ.
There are no obstructions to the Sacrament.
Nobody checking your pledge statements at the door.
We are a different kind of place.
We cannot earn special status here.
And, special status cannot be taken from us.
Some people might argue that it's not fair.
And to be sure, churches are that place where there is often a devoted circle of members who make things like the Christmas Bazaar happen year after year.
Sure, we'd love new blood.
But, we will not create Pharisaic laws that will bleed people dry.
A church culture is one of abundant generosity, even when such abundance can feel unfair.
Two weeks ago, the Mentored for Mission group from Redeemer, the high school kids, were invited to worship with the church community at St. Gabriel's.
Pharisaic laws might have kept us from gathering together.
We were different races, different sexes, different socio-economic statuses, and even different nationalities.
But we all made our way to that rail together and were instructed by their priest to say "Amen" upon receiving the sacrament.
Amen to the community of the church.
Amen to the culture of the church.
Amen to the refuge and solace of the church.
Jesus says to the crowds those who exalt themselves will be humbled and those who humble themselves will be exalted.
I think of this most when I recall the unique liturgy of the Burial Office in the Episcopal Church. In our church, the body is born into the church with the amazing words:
As for me, I know that my Redeemer lives and that at the last he will stand upon the earth ...
Every person who crosses the threshold from life to death in the Episcopal Church's liturgy receives the same funeral.
The same comforting words from Scripture.
The same anthems.
The same Holy Eucharist
But what is most striking for me is that all the coffins are covered with a simple pall.
A pall is a cloth that makes a coffin uniform.
Therefore, there is no distinction between wood or pine, gold or vaulted, or even a cardboard box.
Our church makes no distinction between one human being and another even unto death.
Truly, Jesus knew that the faith we are to live is one that is authentically generous.
And when our faith is ostentatious let it be so in its abundant generosity.
For in our abundant generosity the culture we create in the church knows neither male nor female, Jew or Gentile, slave or free.
Perhaps, my friends, the next time someone laments to you the hypocrisy of the church, you might tell them about a funeral in the Episcopal church.
You might quote to them:
For none of us has life in himself,
and none becomes his own master when he dies.
For if we have life we are alive in the Lord, and if we die, we die in the Lord.
So, then, whether we live or die,
we are the Lord's possession.
No clichés there.
just the abundant generosity of the love of Jesus Christ.
Before we come into this thick text this morning, we must remember that Jesus left the Pharisees so stumped that they stopped asking questions.
Yes, the give and take and the push and pull of the last few chapters of the gospel seem to have come to a stand still.
Think back with me that over the last few weeks we have tracked all kinds of conversations that really weren't conversations but were truly verbal "traps."
We had the dichotomy of loyalty to Caesar or to God.
We had the silly question over marriage and the resurrection.
But, finally they thought they could stick it to Jesus by asking him to name the most important commandment.
He nailed it by both quoting Deuteronomy "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and all your mind...score one point for Jesus.
He quoted the shema, but then he added his own spin "You shall love your neighbor as yourself."
When these final verbal duels come to conclusion, the 22nd chapter of Matthew ends with these dire words.
"No one was able to give him an answer, nor from that day did anyone dare to ask him any more questions."
So, now the tables are turned.
Instead of being grilled, Jesus is the griller.
He is on his final journey and he is ready to dispense with any pretense--with any niceties.
He is done playing intellectual or emotional games with his critics.
And, today he is coming out against ostentatious examples of religiosity.
To us, this is probably a funny image.
We live far enough away from enclaves of orthodox Judaism that the picture of esteemed rabbis with flowing fringes and phylacteries is a foreign one to us.
(Phylacteries, by the way, are tied on to men's arms, and they use them for prayer. They are made of leather and contain small pieces of Hebrew scriptures literally tied into them.)
But, imagine if you will, people in public doing their very best to show other people that they are at prayer or that they are publicly religious people.
Perhaps, you have struggled with a dimension of religious ostentation.
I know when I first started to regularly attend Ash Wednesday services, I debated whether to wipe the cross formed from ashes from my forehead when the liturgy was over.
And, if I did, would I go so far as to wipe any sign of dirt off my forehead?
Or would I instead leave my cross on as a sign of the penitential nature of the day?
Would that cross for me be a sign of ostentation or perhaps a sign of humbled obedience?
Of course, no one can answer that question for you;
I have finally surmised that as Christianity takes a pervasive back seat to secularism that my little cross is a way for me to witness to my faith on such an important day.
I leave it on and people in grocery stores point out the dirty smudge on my forehead and I blithely smile.
However, the Pharisees desire for honor and homage was of a different ilk.
The Pharisees desire for prestige and honor comes under fire by Jesus because theirs was a need to draw attention to themselves.
Their "brand" of religiosity put a heavier burden on the poor--especially poor peasants and urban poor.
In many ways, their teachings imposed more burdens on the least of these.
So, in light of the journey Jesus has begun in Jerusalem, the journey culminating in the cross, he has said enough.
And, this is where all those horrible clichés come in.
Things like: They say, but they do not do. They talk the talk, but don't walk the walk.
Unfortunately, it is some of these clichés that give us, the church, a bad rap.
But, really we don't need to take these things to heart if we dig deeply and show people who we are...The church, at her best, is a community gathered without the hypocrisy of those few Pharisees.
Yes, our clergy wear collars.
You may say that is vain.
I merely say it's helpful.
When you go into a restaurant, your waiter usually wears black.
That's helpful, too, so you know to whom you should gesture to place your order.
But, I posit that the church is the one place where we all receive the same treatment before God. In the culture of the church, it is your baptism that you share with everyone else here.
Not one of you got to skip it because of the street you live on, or because you had a PhD by your name, or because your mother was a founding member of the Daughters of the American Revolution.
In the church, we are all asked to pledge of our time and our talent.
But, let's be frank, we are also asked to pledge of our finances.
Some of you pledge a lot of money, some of you pledge a little, some of you don't pledge at all. And, yet, we all gather with our hands, palms up, and receive the body and blood of Jesus Christ.
There are no obstructions to the Sacrament.
Nobody checking your pledge statements at the door.
We are a different kind of place.
We cannot earn special status here.
And, special status cannot be taken from us.
Some people might argue that it's not fair.
And to be sure, churches are that place where there is often a devoted circle of members who make things like the Christmas Bazaar happen year after year.
Sure, we'd love new blood.
But, we will not create Pharisaic laws that will bleed people dry.
A church culture is one of abundant generosity, even when such abundance can feel unfair.
Two weeks ago, the Mentored for Mission group from Redeemer, the high school kids, were invited to worship with the church community at St. Gabriel's.
Pharisaic laws might have kept us from gathering together.
We were different races, different sexes, different socio-economic statuses, and even different nationalities.
But we all made our way to that rail together and were instructed by their priest to say "Amen" upon receiving the sacrament.
Amen to the community of the church.
Amen to the culture of the church.
Amen to the refuge and solace of the church.
Jesus says to the crowds those who exalt themselves will be humbled and those who humble themselves will be exalted.
I think of this most when I recall the unique liturgy of the Burial Office in the Episcopal Church. In our church, the body is born into the church with the amazing words:
As for me, I know that my Redeemer lives and that at the last he will stand upon the earth ...
Every person who crosses the threshold from life to death in the Episcopal Church's liturgy receives the same funeral.
The same comforting words from Scripture.
The same anthems.
The same Holy Eucharist
But what is most striking for me is that all the coffins are covered with a simple pall.
A pall is a cloth that makes a coffin uniform.
Therefore, there is no distinction between wood or pine, gold or vaulted, or even a cardboard box.
Our church makes no distinction between one human being and another even unto death.
Truly, Jesus knew that the faith we are to live is one that is authentically generous.
And when our faith is ostentatious let it be so in its abundant generosity.
For in our abundant generosity the culture we create in the church knows neither male nor female, Jew or Gentile, slave or free.
Perhaps, my friends, the next time someone laments to you the hypocrisy of the church, you might tell them about a funeral in the Episcopal church.
You might quote to them:
For none of us has life in himself,
and none becomes his own master when he dies.
For if we have life we are alive in the Lord, and if we die, we die in the Lord.
So, then, whether we live or die,
we are the Lord's possession.
No clichés there.
just the abundant generosity of the love of Jesus Christ.
All Hallow's Eve
Our squirts decided early on that they wanted to be Harry Potter and Rapunzel for Halloween. It seemed so funny to me--especially because Elias has not read any of the Harry Potter books. Adelaide, on the other hand, picked up the Rapunzel fervor from good old Disney culture. We went so far a to buy her a funny blond wig, which we then misplaced until the morning of Halloween. She tried it on at breakfast, but was pretty content with the outfit we created out of our dress-up supply. Elias did get a Harry Potter cape and we did the rest complete with Mommy's make-up on his forehead; he thought that was really cool. Our trick or treating was fantastic and the next day we told the kids they could have as much candy as years old they are. Addie hemmed and hawed a bit, but ultimately the plan flew and they have pretty much forgotten about candy three days later. She ended up eating her four pieces of candy all at once the next day in one sitting.
Unfortunately, we did not get a picture of their dear brother. He dressed up as dragon in hopes that there would be some kind of theme with Harry Potter, Princess Rapunzel, and a dragon. I think he will be wearing the same costume for the Celebration of All Saints so I will try to get someone to take a picture of him then.
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